Showing posts with label Kanye. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Kanye. Show all posts

Saturday, 9 March 2019

Honolulew Part 1

How did HappyMan learn to fly? 
Impenetrable, invulnerable feather skin.
His race class has evolved past the ideology of defense mechanisms thereby having created a dimension void of cleromancy.

(Cleromancy is a form of sortition, casting of lots, in which an outcome is determined by means that normally would be considered random, such as the rolling of dice, but are sometimes believed to reveal the will of God, or other supernatural entities. [Wikipedia])

The bluff: My hotel and restaurant rating blog clocked 1 million hits this month alone. 
The con: free food and shelter.
Why it works(ed): it started today.
How we do: we fucking ball. 

Controversializing a divided nation
C:/ America: the democratic republic split in half. Undivisible? Nah. 100% divided 50/50. Democratic. Republican. Its probably a much older debate, though. 

Honolulu is “No Public Restroom”, HI. Mad potential; zero culturally interesting XP. Does anyone care about dolphin art? No, because 1996 already happened and every shred of fair/exhibition ring-toss garbage existed and was tossed out with glistening particle board.

Hawaii—Honolulu... ew. Just ew. 

If the art and clothing aren’t trashy Santa Monica condo-creep caught mid-pacific garbage, the tourist population is an undertow of what happens when people keep saying, “I can’t even draw stick figures.”

No style points out of ten. 

Airwaves are caught in Honolulu like a triangle: anti-graffiti sentiment posters (you know who you are) can eat eight octodicks and say ten hail Mary’s. Repulsed. 

I mist amidst the occasional crashing on hotel sofas because the concierge admits I look white and prominent so I must be there for a reason (you are never really poor in a Scabal blazer). One by one we wear their sofas a la second hand as an ultra-rich tapestry of specific-use human beings hum about in Japanese, Mandarin, and Korean. Mostly I love the high-end posters coaxing their beautiful woven eyelids with subpar white female models. Killer kawaii, Hawaii. 

All time best gimmick: children busking. Real talented rugrats hang onto keys like dangling from tree branches while all unclimbed super-trees are accented by lines of tents—an emerging subsociety rages and optional homelessness subsists within an economic category of its own undertaking. An addendum on gimmicks—you can’t have two children performers on the same boulevard; or, I mean, you can... but, the novelty is washed out with the tide.

Loiterer unfriendly sunny Honolulu is the perfect model of These United States: anxious for the division to result in its inevitable civil war during the next democratic term.

Next: Grimes—Role Model or Psychic Terrorist? JK bitxh.

Elon, dear. We must chat. 

Friday, 25 May 2018

Beta Test Battle Rap

Polished
Like an Eastern European
You’re opening 
Night, not
Admonished.

Godless.
I’m strong enough 
Without it
I don’t need your strength lie
I’m human. Got it?
Like robot 
But, floral
Can’t touch me 
I’m coral.
Symphonies, Goro
Kombatting
With frequencies 
Lifeless: immortal.
I’m diamond 
You coal. 
Share ciphers 
With Cole
With Kanye
Got soul?
Got dough?
Get low.

Raised on myth
I’m a grown ass man 
Braised y’alls briss
I don’t need your clan
Army of one:
Armed forceps 
Flexed biceps 
Triceratop triceps 
I’m burdened
Not flightless.

Rap hip hop
No accents
I wore so many masks 
I’m askin’
Who was I 
That one time
Those Eras soaked 
In social coats.
Paint brought me
Now I’m not me 
Much better
Much,
Much better.
Something else all together 
Can’t phrase me
Won’t phase me 
Craze glaze me
Never lazy
Never shy
Don’t ask why
Link Navi 
Like LISTEN!
Try forces 
Game canons.
Bomb dropping 
On Gannon’s 
Front porches.
I’m like the USA 
in foreign lands:
No apparent way
Your a gay 
From Uruguay 
I’m CIA 
So get AIDS.
when you get laid.

Can we rap about something nicer?
Like chicken DNA splicer
Modified ironics
Blast class iconic.
Shiny cars 
And superstars
And white picket fences
In green yards.
My pesticides 
leave Insects defenceless
I’m apocalypse 
I x-men
Sarah Connor 
On the fence, men
When I’m flexin
Lexicons
the next in
To heaven  
Achieved while I’m living 
Unlocked and then maxed out
Game genie.
Shout out.
I’m Mad Max meets Lifestyles 
Sega con 
I’m megatron.
Move weight 
Like a megaton
With Fat Albert
And Oprah
Whip dick out
Soak ya.
I am god
Not closer
All truth 
No falser.
You sting like 
An ulcer
I sting like 
The Po-lease
Oh, puh-lease 
I smoke leaves 
You rake.
I’m so real
You fake.
I smoke blunts 
I bake 

You Martha Stewart-ass cake.